Compassionate Parenting
We love our children, yet sometimes we struggle to parent in ways we truly feel good about. Parenting with compassion means finding compassion for ourselves when things get difficult, as well as for our children.
We parents often relate to our children from either a 'power over' or a 'power under' perspective, or a mixture of the two. In power over, we make our children do things we want them to do by using an external motivating tool of carrot or stick. We manipulate, demand, shout, bribe, threaten, plead, reward, give timeouts, punish, use consequences, and withdraw attention from our children. When they do something we don't like, we make them suffer, and when they do something we do like, we offer positive reinforcement to try to make them do the same thing next time. In power under, we submit to our children's demands in our efforts to meet their needs, even though doing so means that our own needs go unmet. Over time, we become exhausted and resentful as we give up more and more of ourselves.
Whenever we operate from a place of either power over or power under, the cost to ourselves and our children is high. Whether we get what we want in the moment or not, our deeper needs for close and loving connection with each other go unmet. Compassionate Communication supports a third position, which involves sharing power with our children. As we develop the skills to understand our own needs, listen empathically to our children and express ourselves compassionately, we develop our relationship with our children, find creative strategies which work for us all, and model powerful ways of being in the world.
Compassionate Communication can support you to turn conflict and stress into opportunities for connection and problem solving, and to truly connect with your children in a heartfelt way. In addition to offering courses for parents and carers already familiar with Compassionate Communication I offer a foundtion level course called Parenting From Your Heart.
We parents often relate to our children from either a 'power over' or a 'power under' perspective, or a mixture of the two. In power over, we make our children do things we want them to do by using an external motivating tool of carrot or stick. We manipulate, demand, shout, bribe, threaten, plead, reward, give timeouts, punish, use consequences, and withdraw attention from our children. When they do something we don't like, we make them suffer, and when they do something we do like, we offer positive reinforcement to try to make them do the same thing next time. In power under, we submit to our children's demands in our efforts to meet their needs, even though doing so means that our own needs go unmet. Over time, we become exhausted and resentful as we give up more and more of ourselves.
Whenever we operate from a place of either power over or power under, the cost to ourselves and our children is high. Whether we get what we want in the moment or not, our deeper needs for close and loving connection with each other go unmet. Compassionate Communication supports a third position, which involves sharing power with our children. As we develop the skills to understand our own needs, listen empathically to our children and express ourselves compassionately, we develop our relationship with our children, find creative strategies which work for us all, and model powerful ways of being in the world.
Compassionate Communication can support you to turn conflict and stress into opportunities for connection and problem solving, and to truly connect with your children in a heartfelt way. In addition to offering courses for parents and carers already familiar with Compassionate Communication I offer a foundtion level course called Parenting From Your Heart.